sick, sad world: board of education edition

gripes i have:

• i get a job as a school counselor at the nydoe and the principal threatens my tenure and job about 10 months after he hired me.
• constant harassment that no one calls him on because everyone was "afraid" of him.
• the reason he wanted me gone? i quote: "you're a good guidance counselor, but i want you gone. if you go now, i'll give you a good recommendation."
• the fact that there was no reason i was fired? oh yeah-
• and the fact that the form i was "discontinued" with clearly stated at the top: NOT FOR GUIDANCE COUNSELORS

let's continue:

• my " hearing " takes place on november 12, 2008 at 65 court street.
• principal does not show
• principal calls in late
• case is NOT thrown out- conspiracy theory? wait- it gets better...
• the superintendent's/principals representative at the hearing states repeatedly for principal to STOP TALKING!!
• don't worry- everything is on tape, recorded.
• i order the tape BEFORE i LEAVE 65 court street.

UFT and DOE tells me:

• Once I receive the results, I can take it to court.
• December January February, etc...go by. No results. NONE.
• over TWO YEARS later, my lawyer FINALLY REACHES them!!
• the case stands.

isn't that weird?  it gets EVEN BETTER!

I STILL HAVEN'T RECEIVED THE TAPE!

Really, DOE? You have the children's educations at heart?

Why don't all staff undergo mandated counseling before they are hired- ESPECIALLY PRINCIPALS AND SUPERINTENDENTS?!!

or maybe, you can answer me why i still don't have the tape that i could have proceeded to a court of law with?

maybe you can tell me why i had to get my LAWYER to actually receive the results, 3 years later?

has this happened to anyone else? i'd like to start a club.

Can you believe it?

When things are going so well in ones life, isn't there bound to always be a "thorn" there, somewhere?

I don't know why, but I always feel this way- in part because in my case, it always happens.

5 years ago, LML and I got married, moved in together, adopted our puppy, went to Greece for the first time together, I got a job in my "career"...and wouldn't you know it?

A thorn, aka, the principal at the school I was working at.

5 years later to present day, LML and I still married, very much in love with each other AND our puppy, relaxed...

and a thorn, aka, someone in denial of the *principal* of the matters at hand.

As the snow comes down outside, I wonder...is there really any reason for one persons negativity? Sure, a lot of people could take things to heart when there was nothing hidden between the lines...but what if all you really asked for was to be listened to by someone you've known basically your entire life-

and they don't give a crap to listen?

Does this make YOU crazy? Delusional? Depressed? Anti-social? Suicidal? Pregnant?

That's what it made *me* yesterday, according to this person. Why, you ask?

I asked this person to stop talking to people about my and my family's personal business, and to please be respectful of my privacy. Violations include:

•  the way she talks about me in front of my face to other people (about stuff that I don't care for anyone to know)
• wants to only go out to clubs and drink, which is not LML and I's thing. It was a few years ago, maybe when we just got married because we'd never done it before. But we're not 21, and we've progressed in things we'd like to do.
• how she balls me out and e-mails everyone we know to make me sound like i'm crazy...since I am not entitled to feelings
• not respecting my wishes with what i like to do and what i *don't* want to do.
• tagging me and virtual strangers in photos *strangers to me* because we're neighbors and we should talk...(really? what business is that of yours? did i force you to go to your next door neighbor and become friends?)
• and then, to be called all of these names AND upon "realizing that i'm pregnant because of mood swings" (which i'm not, but she said so- so she MUST be right, right?) offers to take me out to celebrate...
• because would i really go out and celebrate by drinking if i was pregnant?

Please note that I have always been aware of the differences between me and this other person. This person used to be very good to me and used to ask me how i was feeling...this person has stopped caring. This person has been focusing all her attentions on herself and petty things, not caring who she hurts in the process. But...upon being labeled all these things above, this person claims that they will always be there for me so that I should go to them with my problems since I have so many.

No joke.

My problem, once again...and maybe YOU have caught on...

is MY PRIVACY. SHUT YOUR MOUTH ABOUT MY PERSONAL LIFE, ATTRIBUTES, WHEREABOUTS, GOINGS ON!

Last I checked, I HAD a mouth. Still do. I can use it at will...apparently, this person has never had me use my mouth to defend myself to them, and now that I have I am mental.

My sister said it's the Jamaica in me that should have came out when I was young. My husband claims it's because I grew up and realized that I'm not a doormat.

Whatever the case, what would you do if...this person...was doing this to you?

Love,
globetrotting gamine

I don't do texting.

(repeat picture of my assistant, but notice the phone in the background!)

Yes, I am the only person in the world who cannot stand texting. I love my friends dearly, but I do not love texting.

I do not have the internet on my phone.

In fact, the last 21 days of not using my cell phone were the happiest in my life...since cells came along :)

Why can't you just pick up the phone and call me? Or shoot me an e-mail? Why do I need to have a virtual radar-signal on my ass so that you will be able to contact me about something you want at all times?

Do I bother you if I want something, through a text? Pick up the phone!
Do I send you forwards through e-mails, that you'll think I would WANT one through text messaging? It costs money for people who aren't unlimited, you know!

Blech!

You can keep your high-tech fancy "crackberries". I want a cell phone to have buttons, not a touch screen. I want to have it in case of emergency, if I can't find you or you can't find me.

It used to be so much fun when you couldn't WAIT to get a phone call (in the 80s and 90s) at HOME! It used to bring the family together when you used to vie for phone time (sorry, parents ALWAYS won).

If I had a child who refused to put down their phone, I'd boil it and serve it for dinner. My niece and nephews are inherently lucky that I am only Auntie and not Mommy.

And people wonder why there's a 50% divorce rate. COMMUNICATE the way we USED TO!

Geez. I am filing this post under harassment!

Love,
MG

My Vocational Development

In October of 2002, I wrote this essay for a class I was taking in my graduate program. Here it is, today, revised.
"When I was a little girl, I wanted to be everything and do everything. Of course, watching the grown-ups around me AND television, I realized that I couldn't very well do everything. But I WOULD try to squeeze everything into my schedule.
One of the earilest memories I have of being a little girl is sitting up in my room, in the middle of a pile of papers, pens and crayons. I was making a "family newspaper". In the newspaper, I would attempt to draw pictures and add articles about what was going on with each different family member. My older sister didn't like this idea after my parents saw my paper, so the "family newspaper" idea was nixed.
After years of 'job flip- flopping', I realized by the time I was in my teens that I couldn't do anything science or math related. It just wasn't me, and I couldn't get the hang of either subject without the help of outstanding teachers or tutors. Or both. I realized I wanted to help people.
At this time, I was more aware of the world around me. I knew that everything else I wanted to be as a little girl made a lot of money if you worked hard- and I also knew that it wasn't for me. I started to get a greater understanding of budgets and acquiring money when I was in the 10th grade. My parents went on vacation for a few months and had left me with an allowance to hold out until mid-September. I pulled it off without a problem. I was never broke, and I came out saving more money then anyone thought I would.
Since I was aware of the value of money, I was also aware of what the world around me needed. I didnt' want to be a police officer for the money. I wanted to be an officer to help people and make a difference.
I had some time before I settled down in this career choice, and I decided that instead of depending on my parents for money, I should get a job. Not wanting me to venture out into the real world yet, my father decided to take me under his wing at his job, since he needed someone there to e a secretary and receptionist. This had to be me, since I was the most organized person in the family. When that time span was over, every file and piece of paper missing was found, organized and color-coded.
4 jobs later, sometimes 3 at a time, I completed my bachelor's. I changed fields- and completed my Masters. I was barely 23.
Lo and behold, a year later I actually get a job in my field just two months after I got married. The job landed on my lap, and the person who found me it was trying to prevent me from getting it because the boss was a loon. And was she ever right...
He landed on the news 3 years later. Resigned from pressure. He harassed me and multiple others in the workplace, with no consequences for himself, but I was terminated and my career was not even 4 years in. My work was excellent accoriding to the three other supervisors I'd had. I've been writing letters and making phone calls since, but why would the government want to be found wrong?
Well, karma will get them all when they're down, won't it? So here I am, a year and a month out of a job that felt like home and where everyone was a big family. Writing, researching, and trying to figure out why.
And the rest? I wrote it. In a book that I've not finished editting. Will it be a best-seller? I don't care. I'm not even 30, unemployed, and overqualified to get any job I apply to. The job market for my field sucks, and there are NO leads! I speak 3 languages,  have countless certfications. SO SO SO Frustrating! All flushed down a drain because of one man who is actually recorded, photographed and the like for being insane. And he's still working somewhere else, directing people. Heaven help us all.

Thanks for the chance for letting me get that off my chest!

Much Love,

MG