the great legging escapade

since my weight-loss...
i have come to wearing a uniform of leggings and flowy shirts
or jackets.

one saturday, while it was still snowy...
LML and I found an opportunity to find one
such pair of nice black leggings.
on sunday morning?
i realize that he purchased an extra small?!

extra small??? do i look like an extra small to you?, i ask...
yep, LML says.
right. my ass is NOT getting in these.
yes it is.
oh god.

so we pull on the pair of leggings...
as a team effort.
and the effort doesn't go unrewarded,
because once past my hips
they feel great.



continuing our sunday morning, we made our way
to a little cafe called avenue, in astoria, new york...
to have a frappe, which is as close to a "GREEK" frappe as
you're going to get
without you going to greece :)

while sitting down, i pull my coat up around my legs
because the cafe was busy and people kept
coming in and out of the door next to us.

finishing our frappe, we had to continue on
to our food shopping adventure at
the local fresh-food market.
i figured, now is a good time to go to the bathroom
because the sugar in the frappe
(in greek, pronounced  FRA- peh)
is enough to make anyone loopy if they
don't get it out of their system fast enough.

and sorry if i get icky for you here...
as i go to pull down my leggings, what do i see?

my thigh.
a ball of my thigh sticking out
the gaping hole
right near my crotch.

good thing i bought the coat with me to the bathroom!
good thing the coat covers my bottom!
imagine if i wore that vest this morning
that didn't cover anything??!

so i hurry out of the bathroom
and whisper into LML's ear...

houston, we have a problem.


there is a hole in my leggings. near my crotch. we have to go.
block my ass just in case.

let me see.

uh NO. there are PEOPLE here EATING FOOD.
hell to the no.

this does not stop him from going to the fruit market.
this does not stop us from walking...
to the shops up the block (thank GOD)

and finally...
finding another pair of leggings
that literally...
saved my ass.

or rather, my thigh.

the moral of the story here is: always check on your leggings :)



  1. Hahah!! Same thing has happened to me. All is well with the world until a fleshy ball of leg comes popping out! Sounds like a fun day aside from the legging debacle!! <3

  2. Oh yikes! That would have been pretty embarrassing if someone else saw that. I will definitely keep in mind to check the leggings before buying.

  3. I am not an adventurous dresser in the least bit, but my friend convinced me I needed to own a pair of those super stretchy skinny jeans that feel like leggings, but are technically jeans. Halfway through the day I realized the skin right below my right butt cheek had been hanging out for...God knows how long. Unfortunately, I was not wearing a long shirt and people saw my pasty white butt skin.


  4. It's really important to always check out your outfits. Especially those leggings. They're dangerous, lolz. Thank goodness, no one saw you in that situation. ;D

    Travel and Living
    Job Hunter

  5. hahaha aww i loved this story, but i am sorry about it happening to you! i love me some leggings too :))


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